How to Do a Cord Cutting Ritual and Break Energetic Ties for Good

There are times in your life when you need a clean energetic break from someone. Or, something. A cord cutting ritual is a powerful spiritual practice used to sever unhealthy emotional and energetic ties between you and another person.

Whether you’re trying to move on after a breakup, release a trauma bond, detach from a narcissistic relationship, or stop obsessing over someone, cutting energetic cords can help you reclaim your energy and find closure.

In this guide, you’ll learn how to do a cord cutting ritual (sometimes called a spell) safely and effectively, whether you prefer a visualization method or a candle cord cutting ceremony. I’ll explain what cutting energetic cords actually means, what to expect after, signs the ritual worked, and also answer some common questions about cord cutting.

A cord cutting ritual is not about revenge or harming someone. It is about releasing attachment. When emotional bonds become obsessive, draining, codependent, or otherwise unhealthy they can linger long after the relationship has ended. (They can also be useful if a love spell got too intense.) Cutting cords is a symbolic act of severing those energetic ties so both people can move forward.

When done properly, this ritual is final. It should not be done impulsively or during a temporary argument. I say this because in an era where people are framed as toxic and boundary setting is chic, the cord cutting ritual has, understandably, gained popularity. It should be used as a last resort, because when done properly, the ritual is permanent.

What Is Cord Cutting?

Cord cutting is a symbolic magical act of severing the energetic bonds between yourself and another person or situation. When we form emotional bonds, especially intense ones, we create energetic attachments. Some of those attachments nourish us. Others drain us.

I’m sure you feel the same about some of your family members or co-workers. But, most of those don’t require a cord cutting. They might, however, require you setting their numbers to “do not disturb” on your phone.

Times to use cord cutting:

• The connection feels obsessive or intrusive
• You need to disconnect energetically from a toxic relationship
• You’re stuck in the web of a narcissist
• You’ve tried to move on after a breakup but can’t
• The relationship ended, but the attachment didn’t
• You’re obsessing over someone and the feeling isn’t mutual
• You’re ready to end an unhealthy attachment or trauma bond
• You’re struggling with codependency or obsessive attachment

What Are Energetic Cords?

Energetic cords are basically the attachments that connect you and another person or thing. The build naturally as a relationship develops through focus, intimacy, and time together. Or they can build unhealthily through emotional intensity, trauma bonding, or obsession.

In many spiritual systems, including Hermeticism and others followed by ceremonial magicians and some witches, there’s a belief that human beings have a physical form, but they also have spiritual layers that interpenetrate it. These subtle bodies interact and exchange forces through relationships.

In Hermetic theory, where attention flows, energy accumulates. And repeated energy and attention builds structure. When you consistently think about someone, long for them, fight with them, or otherwise bond with them, that repeated exchange reinforces the connection. If your relationship has cycles of emotional highs and lows, that can create unhealthy attachment patterns and can often form strong energetic cords.

For instance, when you meet someone you really click with, you connect with them on a level that’s much deeper than just physical. They impact you on the energetic level too.

Now, imagine you two break up. Breakups suck. Weeks, months, or even years later, you may still find yourself thinking about them, dreaming about them, replaying conversations. The person may be gone physically, but the energetic cord remains active.

This is when the sympathetic magic of cutting cords can help. By severing the energetic connection between you and this other person, you use your Will to release their energy back to them and call your energy back to yourself. A cord cutting ritual works because symbolic action reinforces internal decision. When you enact the separation, your psyche and energy follow.

The Difference Between Cord Cutting vs Banishing

There are many types of magical rituals and spells, and cord cutting is often confused with banishing. While both involve removing unwanted energy, they serve very different purposes. Cord cuttings are sympathetic magic used to remove an attachment. Banishings are used to remove an energy.

For example, if you still feel energetically tethered to your ex, you can do a cord cutting to remove your energetic connection to them. In doing so, it can help you heal and feel less pulled to them so you can move on.

If you banish them, you are trying to make their actual presence go away. If you’re already broken up and don’t see each other, you probably don’t need to do this. If they won’t leave you alone, however, you might. You will also probably want to set up wards, which are a type of protection magic.

As always, use common sense. If someone is causing harm, threatening you, or refusing to respect boundaries, prioritize real-world safety and seek help from authorities if needed. Magic works best when combined with practical action.

How to Do a Cord Cutting Ritual

When it comes to cord cutting, my preferred method is a cord cutting meditation or visualization. It requires no tools but your own focus (or Will).

1. Ground Your Energy

Stand or sit in front of your altar or in a quiet, peaceful space in your home where you will not be disturbed. I like to stand with my feet hip distance apart and my arms at my sides, palms comfortably facing my altar or to the sides. You want to feel both comfortable and powerful, so adjust accordingly.

Close your eyes and take several slow, deep breaths. Ground yourself using meditation or breathwork, or your preferred centering practice. This ritual is probably going to be emotional, especially if you are cutting energetic cords with someone you felt deeply attached to.

If you are unable to stand or sit, you may do this lying down. The posture is not as important as the focus and intention. If you do not have a peaceful space in your home, do this outdoors in a safe space.

2. Visualize a pair of scissors or a sword

With your eyes closed, visualize a cutting tool descending from above into your hand, bathed in light. I often see a large sword, glowing in vibrant purple light descending from above into my hand. Some people prefer scissors. It could also be a dagger or a scythe, or whatever feels right for you. Feel the weight of it in your hand and the power it has.

If you have an athame knife, you could use it for this work.

3. See the cords you are cutting

With your eyes still closed, visualize the cords connecting you and this other person. The cords you want to cut are going to be those that look unhealthy. For me, they show up as black cables. But, perhaps for you they will look like frayed vines, or muddy twine, or ribbons. Some may be thin. Others may be thick and deep.

If you look down (keep your eyes closed), you might be able to see where they’re attaching on you. Some might be attached to your heart, others to your solar plexus, or elsewhere. These attachment points often correspond to places where you’re holding emotional wounds or there were areas of energetic exchange.

You may also see cords that are bright and full of light. Or those that look healthy and make you smile when you look at those. You don’t have to cut those, but you can if you choose to. I usually leave those alone.

4. Cut the cords

Eyes closed, take your scissors or sword and slice through those unhealthy cords. You might find you really have to hack at them to get them to release. You may feel a physical or emotional release as you do.

Sometimes I’ve had to gently place the sword on the ground and grab the cords and start to yank them out with all my might, both from the invisible place they’re emanating from, and from myself. It becomes a very somatic exercise. Let your body and energy take you where it needs to go to remove the cords.

5. Seal Your Energy

Now that unhealthy cords have been removed, place your hands on the parts of your body where those cords were. Imagine those places being filled with a bright healing light. And hold your hands there until you feel grounded and peaceful again. Now move to the next spot and continue until all places on your body that had cords removed feel calm again.

6. End the Ritual

After the cutting cords work is complete, I like to take a few deep breaths, and slowly open my eyes. I take a few moments to take it all in, then I move on with my day or night, though I usually like to keep to myself for a bit afterwards if possible, just to let my energy fully settle.

If during your visualization, you saw the other person you are attached to, now is a good time to visually send them away back to their own path. See them fading or walking away, becoming smaller until you cannot see them anymore. Then, turn your energy back to yourself and see yourself glowing and feeling stronger and whole.

How to Do A Cord Cutting Ritual with Candles

A candle cord cutting ritual is one of the most popular versions of this spell because it makes the separation visible. As the twine burns and the candles pull apart, you witness the symbolic severing of energetic ties in real time. I personally prefer visualization work, this method can be powerful if you resonate with physical ritual tools. It can also be used for divination.

What You’ll Need

• Two candles (chime or figural candles to represent each person)
• A 10–12 inch piece of thin, burnable twine or string
• A fire-safe dish, bowl, or plate
• A lighter or matches
• Optional: a carving tool for names or initials

You may choose candle colors based on intention (pink for romantic attachment, red for passion, white for neutrality, black for release). Dyed candles are a relatively new invention so this is more about adding to the sympathetic magic and giving your mind something to focus on.

If it feels aligned, carve your name, astrological sign, or initials into one candle and the other person’s into the second candle. Do not use your athame for carving. Use a separate tool.

Step 1: Prepare the Space

Place the candles upright on a fire-safe surface a few inches apart. If using small chime candles, gently melt the base so they adhere securely, or use chime candle holders.

As you set them up, clearly assign one candle to represent you and the other to represent the person you are cutting cords with and keep your focus on that energy. Also, keep some water nearby for safety if you need to put the candles out.

Ground your energy with meditation or breathwork.

Step 2: Tie the Cord

Wrap the twine around the middle of both candles so that it connects them. Tie it securely, but do not wrap it around the wicks. The string represents the energetic cord between you.

and tie the twine around the candles.

Step 3: Light the Candles

When you feel ready to let go, light the wicks of both candles. Light your candle first, then theirs.

Remain present as the candles burn. Eventually, the flame will reach the twine and burn through the cord, causing it to fall or snap. This is the symbolic moment of separation.

Do not obsess over the flame patterns or wax shapes. The ritual is complete once the cord has burned and the candles have finished burning. This will take about two hours. For safety, I recommend staying in the room with them as they burn.

Step 5: Dispose of Your Ritual Tools

Once fully cooled, dispose of the wax and remaining twine in the trash. Avoid immediately reaching out to the person afterward. Allow the energetic separation to stabilize.

Is There a Best Moon Phase for Cord Cutting?

Full moons are the most powerful for release rituals. But, you can also do this during an eclipse or during the dark moon, which is great for banishings or energetic endings. You could also do a cord cutting spell when the moon is in its waning phase. I don’t tend to work with the planetary hours or days or cord cutting, but you can.

Aftercare Following a Cord Cutting Ritual

After a cord cutting, you can journal about your experience, take a cleansing bath with some calming or protection ingredients like salt, lavender, and rosemary, or you can continue to do grounding work and meditation.

After all, that probably felt pretty intense on an emotional level, and perhaps a physical one too. Once you feel grounded and calm, simply go about your day or evening as you would have otherwise.

You’ll want to avoid reaching out to the person you just cut cords with as you don’t want to reattach yourself on purpose. But, honestly, even if you do that, it’s likely that that connection will drop away soon anyway.

Signs the Cord Cutting Ritual Worked

If you want to know if your ritual worked, you don’t need to know if your candles burned all the way or what shapes were left in the wax. You need to look first at your own energy. Over the next few days or weeks, you will likely have fewer thoughts about this person, less dreams about them, and increased understanding of the situation.

If they were the one who wouldn’t let you go, you should also be hearing less from them and see them engaging with you less and less on social media. (Don’t go and check theirs for fun as that just reattaches you.)

Does Cord Cutting Really Work?

Yes. I’ve found it works on both the magical and the psychological level. On the magical level, you might find that, if done properly, you will be hearing less (or not at all) from this person. On the psychological level, you’ll likely discover that you no longer have an interest in them and that they no longer have power over you.

FAQ

Can you do a cord cutting ritual on someone you still love?

You can but I don’t recommend it. Now, your magic may vary, but every time I’ve done something like this, things went badly and the relationship ended up dissolving. What I would recommend instead is to do a love healing spell or some connection work. (We carry love healing spell kits in the shop.) If you two work on healing the relationship together, those unhealthy cords will release naturally.

Can I cut cords with friends or family?

You can cut cords with anyone you no longer want to have an energetic attachment to. I would not recommend cutting cords with anyone who you want to stay friends or energetically connected with. Reconnection rituals and healing work is a better choice, depending on your intention. If this person is truly an unhealthy connection for you, then yes, you can cut the cord.

Is cord cutting permanent?

I’ve found it is. I really don’t recommend doing it if you are just in a small fight or having a disagreement with someone. If you want to repair the connection, use a healing spell if the connection is a healthy one. I know some witches believe that you can reconnect after a cord cutting, but I’ve honestly found once those cords are cut, they’re gone forever. So, choose your magic wisely.

Are the cords literal?

No. If the cords are literal, you might be stuck in the Upside Down. Or trapped on a ship that belongs to the Borg.

Is cord cutting dangerous?

No, you’re cutting an energetic tie, not doing harm to them or yourself directly. If anything, it’s healing as it allows both of you to walk away from an unhealthy situation.

How many times should you do a cord cutting ritual?

If you do it correctly, you should only need to do it once. If it doesn’t take, you might need another type of magic such as a freezing or banishing spell. Magic, even fire spells, doesn’t always work within days or hours, so you might need to be a little patient, but it should take hold within weeks if not sooner.

What happens if the candles or twine don’t burn all the way?

There are two ways to look at this. One is that once you light the wicks, the fire magic has been cast. What happens after is irrelevant. The other is to use candle wax, candle flames, and what happens with the twine (how it falls, what shape it fell in, etc.) as a form of divination. I follow both approaches. It depends on what feels energetically right.

Why do I keep finding myself in unhealthy attachments?

Your core beliefs. Your upbringing. The shadow work you haven’t done. Until you face (and befriend or release) your own inner demons, you’re going to keep getting the same thing in a different box.

No matter how many pretty crystal grids you do or love spells to call in your person, if you don’t do the work on yourself to retrain your subconscious to stop believing things like “I’m not worthy” or “I don’t deserve love” or “I always get abandoned,” you will probably keep picking the wrong person to attach yourself to. This is because your subconscious won’t make you a liar and it will pick someone for you that makes those beliefs true.

A few ways through this include shadow work journaling, EFT tapping (Gala Darling is my fave for this, but the method should be consistent across practitioners), books like You Are a Badass, and lectures or courses. I went through MITT which takes a lot of the useful ideas in popular self-help books and helps you integrate them through somatic exercises. It’s super intense and you still need to keep doing the work after, but I found it helpful during a time when I had lost myself.

Also, as a final thought on this topic, you don’t need to “fix” yourself before you find your true love. Working on yourself is a lifelong journey. But, it will be immensely helpful for you if you become aware of your own patterns so you can recognize when you are choosing someone who fits those versus picking someone who is best for your highest good.